• Local hostelries

  • Social media

  • Useful links

  • Categories

  • Archives

  • Meta

  • Wiltshire Tour – 2nd/3rd August

    by Tobe in Uncategorized | Posted on August 3rd, 2014 | No Comments

    Sydenham CC vs Wiltshire Drinking Establishments
    Sydenham chose to drink and came off worse – PH’s won by a bottle of Pernod
    Man of the Match: Toby ‘Tote’ ‘Cheery Face’ ‘Smiler’’ Roe

    So off we travelled from our beautiful Oxfordshire village into Wiltshire, arriving (by the way of the Greyhound PH) to Jct17 and the equally stunning Leigh Delemere services where we rested our bags for the evening. Our rooms had splendid views of the service station wall opposite and as quickly as we had arrived we were gone again.
    Arriving at The Jolly Huntsman PH we had our full quota of 10 players, then Paul Reynolds turned up….even better we all thought! After much thought and some furious eating we decided that captain Roe should pay the price for his previous indiscretions as captain and we strung him up good and proper, even his Jeep got the string treatment. (Though this was not apparent until the following morning) A quick jet wash and all was forgotten however!

    So with all fed and well watered (largely by 6X and Rioja) we thought our best bet was to drink even more at a new establishment, unsurprisingly we did not get the warmest welcome when eleven drunken fools (+ Briggs) who?? exactly!! tumbled through the door of the Elmed Huntsman PH at about 10:30pm. The landlord had (it turned out from our return the next morning to return stolen mementos and him telling us his life story) had a particularly long day of idiots turning up in his pub causing much noise and frivolity. Much to the annoyance of his wife, apparently!
    After the first quiet drink the drinking games started and it was quickly apparent that only one person (fool) from the group was going to suffer more than the rest, poor captain Roe was just incapable of getting his head down and staying sober, and so it was he fell through his parents door at 1am* when the rest of the team were safely tucked up in bed on the slow lane of the M4 westbound (though only after some KrispyCreme Doughnut’s were kindly gifted our way)

    On rising the next morning we realised that much of the above would have to be made up to fit the profile of such an elite sports team in order to avoid the ICC statutory 2 match ban for professionals conduct. Luckily David Boon was too busy brushing his moustache to make a ruling prior to our game the next day. And so it was we all went off to our match in high spirits.
    *Earlier in the day, unfortunately for Toby and his parents, Will and Sue, Toby’s dog Monty had urinated all over the hall way (apparently this is quite normal behaviour in Wiltshire!?) and on entering the house without proper use of the door handle at 1am Roe slipped and banged his head on the hallway floor. This clearly effected the clarity of his memories of the previous evening as his version of events were rather different to the above report, we all know what really happened!

    Comments are closed.